I think I’ll remember my own LIFE

I hate the news.  I really do.  I hate how it’s almost always depressing or disturbing, and very rarely is it good news.  However, I also have this overwhelming need to know what’s going on.  EVERYWHERE.  About ANYTHING. 

Lately, I’ve been sucked into this horrific story about a 15 year old girl who was gang-raped at her homecoming dance while TWENTY people just stood there and watched (or participated).  I’m horrified.  I’m heartbroken, and honestly, the whole story makes me want to cry and vomit at the same time. 

Most women at some point in their life (right now it’s about 1 in 4) will face some sort of rape or attempted rape in their life.  And most women have had times in their life when they’ve been made to feel uncomfortable or unsafe around a guy, even if nothing is physically done to them.  Now take that horrible feeling and imagine what this poor girl is going through.  I’m not kidding when I say that I cry everytime I read something about it. 

It’s sickening. 

And I’m not really sure how to make a segue here, but I don’t really want to end this post on something so depressing.  So…this is my terrible segue. 

Running has been going pretty terribly.  I went on an easy run on Tuesday and almost killed myself.  It was fun.  Except the exact opposite. 

It was an easy 2.5 mile tempo run.  The course I run on is a trail and has a couple of rolling hills.  Nothing super tough, and I run over about 3 “bridges” which are really just some 2 x 4s put together to extend the path over drainage ditches and a small creek.  I was running along trying to keep up the pace (oh my god I’m EVEN SLOWER now from doing all the long distance training and not as much speed work) and running about an 11 min pace (sad that that’s my tempo pace I know haha) and my knee just gave out from under me mid step while crossing one of the “bridges”.

I stumbled and fell over the edge of the “bridge” and landed on my head and shoulder about an inch from a huge rock.  It hurt a lot (I can’t even imagine if I had HIT the rock).   I got back up and tried to keep running but my knee wouldn’t hold me up. 

I could walk with barely any pain, but the minute I tried to run…my knee stopped working and sharp shooting pains went through my knee.  Same thing again the next day.  My knee feels a couple of twinges if I step wrong while walking, but not really anything awful…and it’s much better today, but I can’t run for the life of me.  Luckily it’s not giving out on me anymore…but its definitely painful when I attempt to run. 

So what the hell just happened to it? 

I’m trying to rest it until this weekend and will attempt to run again either Saturday or Sunday.  If it doesn’t work out I guess I’m going to a doctor?  Argh. 

So I’ve been playing on the computer and knitting (and eating more than I should be haha). 

Anyways, I finished a sock a few days ago…now I just need to start the second one.  And my mystery socks are almost done…I just need to finish the foot of the 2nd one and do both toes and I’ll be done.  I kind of like knitting both socks at the same time instead of starting and finishing one, then starting and finishing the second.  It’s a lot more satisfying when you finish them at the same time

Anyways, here’s a picture of the finished sock waiting for it’s match to be made.  I’ll post the mystery socks as soon as I’ve finished them this week hopefully. 

 Again, my camera phone sucks at taking pictures.  But the yarn is an orange, gray and burgandy color with glitter!  Yay glitter!  It looks like fall colors.  I liked the yarn better in the ball then I do in the sock, but it’s not terrible.  :-)  And the sock itself is kind of fun (although not as stretchy as ribbed socks usually are). 

Anyways, have a great day today!

You know what’s fun?  Trying to buy a coffee and being told your debit card doesn’t work (you know…your debit card that you KNOW has money in the account).  Really, its pretty embarassing to be told you can’t buy a $3 cup of coffee because you “don’t have the funds”. 

Then, you check online on your phone to see what’s up with your account, and you’re told they’re offline right now and you can’t access the online banking.  So, then you go straight to the ATM to make sure you really DO have money in there and nobody took it or anything and it turns out you really do have more than enough to pay for a $3 cup of coffee. 

So, not only did I look like an ass that didn’t have $3, I also don’t have my cup of coffee.  So not happy right now. 

However, at least I had a good weekend.  J is down in VA for a few days this week for work, so she came down on Friday evening and we hung out for the weekend.  Friday was pretty quiet.  By the time she got here, she was super tired so we didn’t really do much.  Just watched a bunch of episodes of Family Guy (apparently they play like 6 episodes back to back on Friday nights??) before going to bed. 

Saturday we were supposed to go see a friend’s band play at a festival…but the weather was not happy, and apparently the guy who organized the festival…didn’t really organize the festival and it was a big mess and only like 10 people were there…so we were told to not even come.  So, we went shopping for a while and then went and watched some movies at home. 

That evening we went to a roller derby double header and it was really interesting.  I’ve never been to a roller derby game/bout/match/thingie and didn’t really understand it.  The first match made sense.  I understood the points and the fouls and things like that (probably b/c the other team wasn’t very good so didn’t really score AT ALL).  But the second match thingie made NO SENSE AT ALL.  I was so confused.  A girl would get pushed down by the other team, and then she was the one that would end up in the penalty box.  And the points made no sense at all.  I was so confused. 

But, it was still enjoyable even if I had no idea what was going on.  That happens a lot to me.  I’ve learned to just accept it and do my best to follow along. 

Sunday was spent watching football.  Always fun.  Even if none of my teams did well.  And both my fantasy teams are losing AGAIN this week.  So not a fan.  I seriously think I had the lowest scoring game of my life in the one league.  It’s terrible. 

So, hopefully the Eagles win tonight and at least then all my teams won’t have failed haha.

Today started out as a new low for myself. 

I woke up around 6:30 and was getting ready for work.  I sat on the bed to put on little O’s leash, and I woke up 1.5 hours later.  Awesome. 

Lucky, Oscar doesn’t really enjoy mornings either so he just went back to sleep as well.  We went for his walk at 8:15 and I made it to work around 8:45 (ha…STILL on time).   Go me. 

Ugh, so not my finest moment.  But I totally blame it on the Phillies.  Took WAY too long to win the game and I was up way past my bedtime and I was extra tired this morning. 

But yay Phillies!

Anyways, I’ve been slacking off way too much with my running/exercise.  My knees start aching really badly when I’m not getting out enough and they are KILLING me today (seriously…whose knees bother them when they DON’T run????).  So, I guess I need to try and do some more running today.  Sigh.  So not feeling it. 

However, I just promised myself that if I run the 4.5 mile loop at the park today I’ll go get a brownie from the book store.  They have the most amazing brownies and I haven’t had a brownie in so long!  This way my knees will be happy…and so will my belly. 

Anyways, not much going on…so back to work I go.

I am in a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad mood. 

My computer is the biggest piece EVER!  I have to start and restart it FIVE times EVERY FREAKING MORNING to get the damn thing to boot and actually start.  Sometimes, it will start without this.  But then my mouse and keyboard don’t work so I have to restart it again.  I then usually have to start and restart it an additional five times…leading me to turning my computer on and off TEN TIMES before I can do any work.

It takes an average of 9 minutes from the time the computer starts actually working right to  when I can actually do anything on it (as in it takes 9 minutes for my computer to “load my personal settings” and install, uninstall, and reinstall all my programs).  According to our IT department this is NORMAL????? 

Once my computer is on and working, it then takes an additional SEVEN minutes to open Microsoft Outlook.  This goes up to about ten minutes if I attempt to open Internet explorer at the same time.

An average morning requires approximately 45 MINUTES to be able to start doing anything on my computer. 

This is NOT NORMAL, I don’t care what the hell my IT department says.  And seriously, if this IS normal for the company…we need to do something about it. 

Then, I have a hole in the stairwell office (literally…my office is a little side room off the 2nd floor in the stairwell…this office is the ONLY thing off the stairwell in the 2nd floor…there is no real second floor over here.  Only a 20 x 20 room shared with 5 other people).  We do not have real internet connection.  We have a co-axial cable that connects all 6 computers to the internet and each other.  If one computer goes down…we all go down. 

I am having major issues staying connected to the internet this morning.  So far I have been disconnected 10 times in 20 minutes.  I’ve had to restart my computer an additional 3 times this morning (going through the entire process all over again) in order to get my computer to work. 

I’ve been here since 7 this morning (it is now 10 AM).  I haven’t accomplished a single thing other than turning on and off my computer.   Literally. 

And lets not even get me started on how often this thing freezes up for no reason.  Last week I lost an entire report because the computer froze.  Best part, I was saving the report every two pages or so.  But, when the computer froze, it decided to ignore all the saves…and recovered the file back at the FIRST PAGE and the so called “saves” I was doing…apparently didn’t really save.  ARGH!

I am so grumpy right now that I honestly want to throw my computer down the stairs (the ones right outside my door) and claim I need a new computer.  Sigh. 

Please tell me you have some good news for me today?

Ugh…this weekend football has been terrible. 

Eagles sucked the big one.  I’m pretty sure the football fairies were decimated (as of now I’m losing 202 - 69), however, I still have 6 more players to play.  But yeah, I’m gonna just chalk that up as a loss.  I’m pretty sure I’m not going to make 202 points.  Sigh.  And the pretty pink princesses are too close to call right now.  Either way…not a good football weekend.  Only happy note…both the Giants AND the Skins lost. 

Sigh. 

I also saw that three people died in the Detroit marathon.  How sad.  And two of them were really young.  It’s crazy…it wasn’t even hot during the race (yes, I realize heat is not the only reason people die during marathons..but three seems like an awfully high number for such a cool marathon). 

I didn’t go running this weekend…I’m seriously sucking at the whole running this lately. ..however I did bake some yummy cookies.

So…schedule this week:

Monday: Run 4.5 miles

Tuesday: Gym

Wednesday: Run 4 miles’

Thursday: Gym

Friday: Run whatever I feel like 

Anyways, hope everyone had a more exciting weekend than I did.

I was driving to work this morning and flipping through the radio stations since my MP3 player decided to take a break from working (thank you very much Starbucks coffee for spilling all over the inside of my car and soaking the player.  I hope it works after it dries out…).  I accidentally flipped to a  morning show which I DESPISE. 

The two DJs are pretty much everything I despise about southern conservatives (I would like to state for the record that not every southern person that is conservative  is also a southern conservative and there are some people that live in the north that are southern conservatives).

SOUTHERN CONSERVATIVES are the people that become irrational about ANY OTHER POINT OF VIEW that differs from their own.   They think Obama is a muslim terrorist out to destroy the country and planning to set up death panels to kill their grandmothers.  They set up billboards along the highways that say “Ex-Gays prove change is possible”.  They talk about how religious and awesome they are at the same time they are saying that they are scared we have a black president because now other black people may feel like they have the right to step up and better themselves (this is an ACTUAL word for word quote from someone).  These are just a few examples…they go on and on.

Anyways, I can honestly say I don’t think I have EVER agreed with anything this radio show has talked about until this morning.  They were discussing the flu vaccines and how employers of certain institutues are making them mandatory whether or not the employee wants to get them. 

Personally, I hate flu vaccines and I don’t believe in them.  I especially don’t believe in a flu vaccine that was developed and rushed to market in a few months.  I don’t have an issue with other people wanting to take a vaccine…but I have a HUGE issue with people being forced to take the vaccine.  I realize some people really think they are great, and they may even be helpful for people with compromised immune systems, but I personally don’t believe there is a benefit to me taking a vaccine.  Yes, there were some initial tests that showed no side effects, but what about effects that could possibly show up in 2-3 years?  How many medicines have there been that they claim are perfectly safe…and then a few years later they are pulled off the market due to adverse side effects. 

Anyways, it was just a weird shock to actually agree with these people even if it was over something as small as a flu vaccine. 

So…moving on.  I’ll end the week with some more knitting:

My latest fingerless gloves.  Just a small, light weight glove perfect for wearing and typing (and ignore my short and stubby fingers…I hate my fingers haha).  The cuff is only about 1.5″ long and the palm ends about 1/4″ above the fingers.  My co-workers make fun of me and call them my driving gloves…but I love them and they are exactly what I wanted. 

Here’s a picture of the two of them side by side. 

Everyone notice my ugly gray plastic desktop, and I swear the gloves are the same size…it was just the angle I took the picture at

Anyways, hope everyone has a fantastic weekend!

Ok…as much as I dislike baseball…YAY PHILLIES!!!  Way to almost blow the game…and then come back and have a FANTASTIC last inning.  I’ve never seen 50,000 people shut up so QUICKLY in my life.  Awesomeness!

And not that I care…but yay Miami for using the wildcat offense a ridiculous number of times in one game and totally confusing the Jets.  I didn’t really care either way who won, but the game amused me so I was happy. 

Boo doing something stupid to my neck last night, making it hurt to turn my head past a certain point.  And holy crap touching it.  I practically spasm it hurts so bad.  Stupid stupid.  What is wrong with me lately?  I’m falling apart!

Another boo having to give my first presentation in over a year tomorrow.  Yet another group of people that will discover how ridiculously fast I speak and having no idea what I’m saying.  Super!

But yay for my boss thinking I’m smart!  (I am so smart…S-M-R-T).  I gave her my slides and did a quick run through with her to make sure I was covering all the points (and not saying anything I shouldn’t) and she LOVED it!  Go me. 

I also gave her a rough copy of the final report I’m doing and aggain she was so excited by it.  I missed feeling this smart and doing fun engineering type things.  So glad I’m done my FLL rotation. 

Another yay for my new business card holder.  It’s not really a business card holder, but I didn’t want a boring plain one, so I found a notebook thing at Barnes and Noble and just took out the notebook.  Now it holds business cards.  See:

I had a wonderful weekend…I hope everyone else had as fantastic a weekend as I did. 

I went to see Bruce Springsteen in the last concert ever to be played at Giants Stadium (the new stadium looks super nice from the outside…but I still like the one in Philly better). 

Seriously, the concert was awesome.  Bruce rocks pretty hard for a 60 year old man (and he just gets better looking the older he gets…).  I had such a great time and I’m glad I got to go with my sisters and dad.  Wouldn’t have been the same with any of my friends (who are not really Bruce fans…so sad). 

Only bad part…he didn’t play Thunder Road.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE that song…and really wanted to hear it…but it wasn’t played and I was sad.  Come on…any song with “you ain’t a beauty but hey you’re all right” as a line has to be awesome.  But he did at least play Born to Run and ended with Jersey Girl (my favorite piece of cheese song ever!) so it almost made up for it. 

Then, on Sunday I was baking and managed to lose my balance (stupid inner ear) and fell against the oven and burnt my leg.  I have blisters on my thigh now and it really freaking hurts.  Stupid clumsy me.  I do not rock right now. 

But at least the cookies rocked!

Then I got to see LL who I haven’t seen since her wedding so that fun. 

Um…oh yeah and my fantasy teams both SPANKED the competition.  So I do rock there.  :-) 

Anyways, 4.5 miles planned for today. 

Hope everyone had a great weekend!  Enjoy the week!

So I cheered for the Vikings on Monday night…and I even liked it :-)  That was such a fun game to watch…and both my fantasy teams won so Go Me!

Unfortunately, I was also sick with an inner ear issue that is causing me to fall over when I turn too quickly.  It’s almost humorous if it wasn’t so annoying. 

However, I’m hardcore and went running yesterday anyway.  And I saw the WEIRDEST thing.  I ran around a curve in the path and there was a girl there.  No…seeing a girl on the path isn’t the weird part.  The weird part is she was dressed in a deerskin dress, she had no shoes on, was wearing a head band with braids in her hair and was shaking a bush and picking up the berries that fell from the off the ground, and putting the berries in a reed basket that was full of other reeds and plants.  I have NO idea where she came from or why she was dressed like an Indian…and I was kind of scared to ask.  But seriously…it was just bizarre. 

Then, I saw bear poop on the path and I got a little freaked out and was paranoid I was going to run into a bear.  I think I need to find somewhere else to go running for a while.  Sigh.

And…I also decided that I’m NOT going to run the half marathon this November.  I was doing a 10 mile run yesterday and I realized I was completely resenting having to run and I was miserable.  I haven’t had fun running in FOREVER and I just want to be able to enjoy running again. 

So, I’m dropping down to only running the 8k.  That means I can drop my training runs down to 4-6 miles (which is my happy distance) and hopefully get back to enjoying my running instead of dreading it.  That was kind of a hard decision to make because I feel like I’m so wussing out when it comes to not running the half, but then I realized it’s stupid to do something for fun…that’s just making you miserable.  Obviously…it’s not fun right now.  So I’m not doing it. 

And maybe I’ll try to do another one sometime next year.  I just need a break from training. 

Anyways, hope everyone is having a great week!

Ok…so I want my dog to look like this for Halloween:

Where do you think I can buy this creepy thing…or how do you think I should make it?  Seriously.  SO FUNNY!